Passport to Independence

Christian and Anita/Photo Courtesy of 'Autism is Not my Name: Christian Tart is!' and Unsplash/Charlotte Noelle

By Melissa Lushington, "Don't Cut Corners...Unless It's Cake" -Blog Series Vol. 6, Slice#1

Do you know what it means to have your life change forever because of one person? Having the right person in your life can open your eyes to harsh truths you were once blind to and reveal new possibilities you didn’t realize were possible. When someone changes your life forever, it can also inspire you to become a better person—someone who fights for advocacy and independence. That’s the story behind an interview I recently had with travel agent Anita Tart-Paschal of the travel company Purrrfectly Yours Travel. Her life changed forever the day she met her son, Christian. This is their story.

It all began in Anita’s younger days, when she started traveling at 13. She went to Florida with her family and church community to visit Disney World at 15. That experience was wonderful, especially for a young woman. It sparked her passion for traveling, and she realized she wanted to be a travel agent. Her trips to places like Hawaii only increased her desire. “I wanted to travel after the Hawaii trip, but I didn’t know how to without breaking the bank,” she said. One day, Anita traveled with a group of women to Las Vegas, and that’s when she began her journey to become a travel agent, meeting with a host agency that provided her with the resources she needed to start her career. “The process was that I

Christian and Anita/Photo Courtesy of 'Autism is Not my Name: Christian Tart is!'

joined a beautiful women’s group. It was a group of women who traveled, and we traveled to Las Vegas in 2013,” Anita explained. “I signed up with a host agency, which allowed me to have a turnkey business, tools, resources, and travel credentials to build a home-based travel business.”

Another life-changing experience occurred when she gave birth to her son, Christian, at age 29. Little did she know this would mark the start of a lifelong journey of transformation, one that would forever alter her life. It began when Anita first noticed signs that her son was different. “I always knew something was wrong with him; he was delayed in reaching milestones, but doctors told me that because he was a preemie, his development would be delayed,” she explained. When nothing changed later, Anita was determined to find answers for her child. One day, her aunt advised her to see a developmental doctor. Initially, she took this advice at face value because her aunt was a nurse at Cooper Medical in Camden, New Jersey, but her aunt recognized the signs and gave Anita a book about autism. When she saw how the traits of autism matched her son's behavior, she was able to identify him as autistic. When Christian was officially diagnosed as autistic, Anita’s immediate response was to figure out where she could go from here. “When I found out, I asked the question: Where do I go from here? What do I do next to help him?” She explained.

Like many autistic parents, Anita had her share of challenges when it came to raising

her son, Christian. “The first challenge was communication. He was nonverbal. At one point he

spoke only one word, and it was never anything else after that. The second challenge was potty

training, and doctors told me that he would never be potty trained and would have to wear adult

diapers for the rest of his life.” She explained. “The third challenge was his running away.

Whenever I turned my back, he would be gone, and that was terrifying. The fourth challenge was

getting my son services at school. It was a fight to get my son the proper help he needed from

teachers and staff members.” Even though there were plenty of rough challenges in the

beginning, there were also some positive, light-hearted memories, and these would be some of

Anita’s favorite childhood memories of Christian. “One memory that sticks in my mind would

be when he would try to walk. Instead of walking, he would slide across the floor, and it was

funny to me.” She explained. “He had beautiful, wavy, curly hair. He loved cars and trucks that he

would always put in a line, and that was always beautiful to me. He would always put the cars

and trucks in size order from small to big.”

Eventually, Anita decided that it was time for Christian to start traveling with her. The reason was that she wanted her son to see the world and experience life outside his home and community. “The motivation was that I wanted him to be able to experience everything out of the box. I wanted him to be able to travel out of the community and experience culture.” She spoke. “He loves trains, he loves sitting by the window on the plane, and he loves bridges. I wanted him to experience different foods and landmarks, and he experienced those in Atlanta,

Jamaica, the Bahamas, and Cozumel.” Christian started traveling with Anita at a very early age of approximately 19 months old. After traveling together for the first time, Anita realized how much planning and preparation it would take. Planning and preparation were key to developing Christian/Photo Courtesy of 'Autism is Not my Name: Christian Tart is!'

strategies to overcome the challenges that would come along the way. Anita explained that, with the love and support of her family, friends, services in the Philadelphia area, and others, she was able to make traveling easier for herself and her son, Christian. “One of the strategies was proper planning. Making sure I had someone there with me for support and assistance, especially when I had three other children.” She spoke. “Things got different over time as he got older because I was able to get better support. The support was love.”

When it comes to traveling, Anita says that Christian loves mostly everything about the

experience. “He likes getting up and going, he likes getting on airplanes, he likes packing his

backpack, he likes packing his suitcase, he likes everything about the traveling experience.” She

explained. “The only thing he doesn’t like is sitting in the middle seat or the aisle seat of a plane; it has to be the window seat.” When Anita first found out that her son was autistic, it was never an issue for her to connect with him. The only thing that mattered to her was being there for her

child, no matter what, and she proved herself to be a devoted mother by showing up to the

hospital every day to make sure she was there for him to take care of him. Before Christian was

born, she had another son named Andre, and she had a wonderful experience taking care of him

due to his being a neurotypical baby. Once Christian was born, everything became different, and

that’s when she started learning the harsh truth about the world. “When I had my Christian, I

knew he was different from Andre because he hardly cried, he was a preemie, and he missed

milestones such as crawling and rolling over.” She explained. I also noticed that people were

cruel. People would stare and treat my children differently. The world was different when

Christian was born.”

Over the years, autism has shaped Anita into a strong voice for the voiceless. It

influences her to fight for people who struggle to get resources, struggle to receive services,

struggle to receive fair treatment, and struggle to obtain independence. “It influences me to the

point where I wanted to be a voice for those who didn’t have one. I wanted to be a voice for the

parent who couldn’t get resources, I wanted to fight for the child, teen, and adult who couldn’t

get proper services, I wanted to fight for independence and advocate for whatever they needed.”

She explained. “Whether it was legal services, travel services, or whatever was needed for

neurodivergent individuals. That was my mission. That is my mission.”

Since traveling with her son, Anita explains that traveling has made a tremendous impact

on her son’s life and has changed the way he interacts with people around him. For example,

Anita explained that traveling has allowed her son to feel more comfortable around people. He’s

well-known and well-liked in the community as well as at home, and he’s also been able to be in

the community and feel included. Another example is that Christian is well-known at the airport

station as well, to the point where security is willing to allow him to go around the search

process, instead of going through it. Anita has also expressed that she has witnessed growth in

her son since traveling with him, even when growth comes in small packages. “He gets better

with every trip.” She explained. “Back in September of 2025, he was able to go on the escalator

going downward when he used to be afraid of doing so previously. So, that was tremendous

growth.”

When it comes to autism, Anita explained that she’s learned many valuable lessons about

people and life itself. Many of those lessons are simply about people who should be more

educated about what autism is, so there could be better training, more inclusion, and better

services for autistic individuals and their caregivers. “There should be more awareness, people

should be trained more, there should be more inclusion, there should be more services across the

board, especially for adults and caregivers.” She explained. “There should be more coaching and

training in law enforcement.”

As an individual, there are plenty of characteristics that Anita admires and adores about

Christian. Christian is viewed as a loving, kind-hearted person whose warm presence can fill a

room, and he has the mentality of an individual who desires independence. “He has this smile

that would light up a room.” She explained. “He has this mentality where he wants to be in

charge. He’s a sweet son. He loves being around his family, and he’s warm when he’s with his

family. Especially his brother Andre.” Christian also has two important special interests that

matter a lot to him, and one of them is so critically important that he NEVER lets himself go

anywhere without it. “He loves his radio. He must have a radio every day and all day with

headphones. He never leaves anywhere without it.” Anita explains. “He also loves his

computer.”

Traveling together has strengthened the bond between Anita and her son Christian because

they’re both able to do something that they can enjoy together. “It gives us that time together to

do something that not only I like, but he likes as well,” Anita explains. “He doesn’t want to travel

without me, and it makes for a happy home.” Anita and Christian also have activities that they

enjoy doing together outside of traveling, such as video games, spending time outdoors,

and eating food together. “We like playing video games. He plays video games on my computer.”

Anita explains. “We like going for a walk. He enjoys going out on a walk with me. He likes going

out to eat with his family; he’s a foodie.”

Anita and Christian have shared many precious memories together throughout their many

years of traveling, and there are two precious memories that Anita holds dear close to her heart.

“The one time on the cruise, he was dancing to music, and everyone was chanting, ‘Go, Christian,

Go Christian.’” Anita explains. “Being on the train, and he would be looking out the window to

see the trains go by as well as bridges.” Anita has also shared some of her favorite places that she and Christian enjoy traveling to, such as Jamaica, Florida, the Bahamas, Washington D.C.,

Cozumel, Mexico, New York, Ohio, Atlanta, South Carolina, Yucatan Peninsula, and Nassau.

In case you didn’t know, Anita is a strong advocate for independence, inclusion, and

acceptance when it comes to the autism community. She’s been a long-term advocate for the

autism community since her son Christian was born, and she’s boldly expressed the many ways

she’s advocated for her son and his rights to independence. “I advocated for him by letting

doctors know that I wasn’t going to take what they were saying, I advocated for him by writing

letters, I advocated for him by getting lawyers, I advocated for him by using as many resources

as I could.” She explained. “I even reached out to different organizations, such as Autism Speaks,

and my son was able to get a free tablet. I advocated for speech and language, counseling,

everything.”

Since she’s been a long-term advocate, you can only imagine how much autism advocacy

means to her. Being an advocate is about having the courage to fight for those who can’t fight for

themselves and fight for those who are often ignored. “It’s about independence, inclusion,

resources, education, and helping those who can’t help themselves. It’s about respect. It’s about Photo Courtesy of 'Autism is Not my Name: Christian Tart is!

acceptance. Especially for those who are adults.” Anita explains. “There are so many resources

out there for children, but once you reach the bracket of age, the whole game changes. It’s about

courage. It’s about being a voice. When I think about my son, he doesn’t have a voice, but his

smile speaks volumes and shows the world that he’s loved and not afraid. However, what he

can’t say, I say. That’s advocacy, and it’s personal.”

Since autism advocacy is personal to Anita, that means fighting for independence is

something that she’s passionate about as well. According to Anita, autism independence can be

summarized as one word: freedom. “Autism independence means that a person would be able to

make choices on their own.” She explains. “They would have their strengths and their needs met

on their own terms in a meaningful, safe environment. Independence means having boundaries

and having those boundaries respected.” From the time that Christian was born to now, Anita has grown a lot as a person, mother, and advocate. The key factor that helped Anita grow as a

person, mother, and advocate is education. “I’ve grown by learning more because the world of

autism has changed since 1990,” Anita explains. “I’ve been able to grow by learning more about

autism. Before, no one knew what autism was, and I learned by reading more, getting

certifications, and joining organizations. The more you know, the more you grow.”

When Anita first found out that her son, Christian, was autistic, learning about autism was an

overwhelming experience for her at first. There was so much information to understand, there

were so many things to figure out; she was introduced to a new world, and the only questions on

her mind were, “What are you going to do now?” and “How are you going to figure this out?”

During the process, Anita was able to connect with other parents with autistic children. There

was one negative experience she had with a mother who didn’t want to say that her child is

autistic, and she was polite and respectful. Overall, Anita would often try to help parents give

resources on autism and legal resources, such as power of attorney and guardianship.

Anita also has a list of autism organizations that she admires and appreciates as good

representations for the autism community. One of them would be the well-known nationwide

organization, Autism Speaks. “Sometimes they get bad reviews; some people say that they don’t

do a lot for autistic people, but I’ve never had a bad experience with them.” She explains. Other

examples would be organizations such as the Autism Self-Advocacy Network (ASAN) and the

Autism Alliance of Michigan.

When it comes to regulation, there are some stimulation methods that Christian uses to help

soothe him when he’s overwhelmed, such as having his mom, Anita, rub underneath his chin and

having his older brother, Andre, help soothe him as well. However, there’s another method that

Christian uses that’s very effective in stimulation. “He uses music. It calms him. He loves the

music.” Anita explains. “Music is everything. I don’t know what it is about music, but the music

soothes him when he’s having anxiety.”

During the interview process, I asked Anita if people have ever undermined and

underestimated her son’s capabilities of achieving great things, and her response to that question was, “No, never. It was always the fact that he could do it.” I also asked Anita what career Christian desires to pursue, and her response was, “He doesn’t. One, he’s nonverbal.

Two, he doesn’t have the thought.” When it comes to having goals, Anita is the one making the

list, and the biggest goal for her to achieve for Christian is having better communication. “He

doesn’t have the goals; I have the goals, and the goals that I have are better effective

communication with his tablet.” Anita explains. Finally, the most important thing Anita wants

people to learn about Christian from this interview is that he’s loved, protected, he’s well-

traveled, and he has a village of people who will always be there to support him. As for her, the

most important thing Anita wants people to learn about her from this interview is that she’s a

giving person who supports others on their journeys. She values the importance of life, and she

loves bringing joy to others. She also wants people to learn something else about her that’s very

important: “I’m a mother who has raised a nonverbal autistic son with joy, the support of family

and friends, and I’m a mother who continues to fight for inclusion, and I want people to see that

my son has turned my life around.” She explains. “He’s given me meaning and purpose, and I

want other autistic individuals to be able to have curated travels just like Christian.”

As you can see, Anita Tart-Paschal has become a powerhouse warrior for the autism

community, all because her son Christian (who is 36 years old today) came into her life and changed everything for the better. Because of Christian, Anita was able to recognize the world for its ableism, lack of inclusion, and lack of understanding about autism. Because of Christian,

Anita was able to connect with other members of the autism community so she can recognize their struggles and hardships to survive in a world that’s not naturally made for them. Because of Christian, Anita was able to use her voice to fight for the voiceless, which includes autistic teens,

adults, and the caregivers who support them. Because of Christian, Anita became a prime

example of what it means to fight for advocacy and independence.

Anita Tart-Paschal and Christian Tart/Photo Courtesy of 'Autism is Not my Name: Christian Tart is!'